As the homeschooling parent of an only child, I have often had people express concerns over whether or not my daughter was getting enough “socialization” because she is not in a traditional school environment. Merriam Webster defines “social” as: "of or relating to human society, the interaction of the individual and the group; tending to form cooperative and interdepen- dent relationships with others of one's kind." Encyclopedia Brittanica states, "According to most social scientists, 'socialization' essentially respresents the whole process of learning throughout the life course and is a central influence on the behaviour, beliefs, and actions of adults as well as of children." I believe that social skills are first learned at home. Children observe early on how families interact and treat one another, and how they interact with others outside of their family. They are taught family values and the common courtesies such as saying “please” and “thank you,” and waiting their turn. Most children already have many social skills before they reach school age.

Most any book on homeschooling will address the issue of socialization. Type in “homeschooling socialization” on your internet browser and there are literally thousands of entries on the subject. It is, indeed, a common question. In an article titled "Life is Not a Number 2 Pencil" on About.com, Lisa Cabello calls it the "S" word. She and her husband homeschool, but she is also a preschool teacher who works with school age children in the afternoon. Lisa contends that traditional school is often a less than ideal place to learn positive social skills. Unfortunately, there are a lot of things that children in traditional schools have to deal with today that weren't there a generation or more ago. Gang violence wasn't something that I personally had to deal with in school, but there were occasional “bullies” and peer pressure to try smoking, drinking, or even drugs. I do remember the cliques and labels put on kids that were dependent on how they dressed or their level of intelligence, which definitely created social gaps.

In another About.com article entitled, "Socialization - The Home School Advantage," author Eric Jacobs, who was homeschooled through ninth grade, writes about how he was often asked questions like, "Do you have any friends?" and "Do you ever get to play with any other kids?" For some reason, people equate going to traditional school with making friends and having other kids to play with! When I went to school, I don't remember a lot of “play” time and, although I did have a couple of friends in my class from year to year, the majority of my friends who I did things with socially were either from my neighborhood, or from extracurricular activities in which I participated. Even as an adult working outside of the home, I can only recall a couple of people I did social things with. Being put in a room with a bunch of other people isn't, by itself, a “social” situation.

Next month I'll share some comments from local homeschoolers on the subject of “socialization.”

© 2008 MBayKids.com - All rights reserved. Privacy | Disclaimer | Advertising | Contact Us